Friday, January 22, 2016

F.R.I.E.N.D.S.



Katie is, like, my funniest sister (sorry, but y'all know it's true) & she sends me funny stuff all the time.

For example, here is a funny thing she sent me:

I'm not a bit  only slightly  just tell them that you're TERRIBLY embarrassed to tell you how much I laughed at this...and still do every time I think about it...which is a LOT because I'm going through all 10 seasons right now. 

And lemme tell ya, it is not hard to figure out why this show was such a hit for so long and lives on in the hearts of fans via Netflix: 
They are living the dream. 
New York City.
High rise apartments.
Friends across the hall.
DOING LIFE TOGETHER.
It's not always easy.
Maybe their job's a joke, they're broke, their love life's DOA.
Maybe sometimes, it's like they're stuck in 2nd gear...when it hasn't been their day, their week, their month, OR EVEN THEIR YEAR.
It will all be ok, because I'LL BE HERE FOR YOU (when the rain starts to fall)...ok, I'm done. I promise.

I mean, come on. Who doesn't want this?? 
Only a heartless fool WITH NO HEART! Hence the term...heartless.

Friends are a God-given miracle wherein people who have absolutely NO obligation to spend time with you, DO…& they LIKE IT. & YOU like it. & you share life’s burdens & life’s joys & somehow the whole lot of it comes out more beautiful & fun & joyous than if they weren’t there.
Seriously, you should look into it.
10 out of 10.
I would recommend it to a friend.
Pun intended.
(disclaimer: I got this joke from Katie. I told you she was funny.)

Moving to Japan has provided some challenges, not the least of which was leaving the best group of friends I've had in my entire life. We were living the dream. 
Columbus, GA.
Cute, historic houses.
Friends next door & across the street & across the park.
DOING LIFE TOGETHER.
It wasn't always easy.
Maybe our job's a joke, JK. I won't go through the song again...I trust you to do that on your own time. In fact, here’s the video if you need a reference.
BONUS: There are more words to this song. You’re welcome.

It was the sweetest season for friendship, outside of the formative years of sibling love, that I’ve experienced to date.

Enter ARMY. & MOVING. & GOING AWAY PARTIES. & GOODBYES.

Yes that is dessert sushi that Meghan made all by herself.
And those decorations? Yeah, all Kate.


And these pictures? All Geoff.

These friends y’all. These F.R.I.E.N.D.S.



Facetime works wonders & let me tell you, when Meghan & I discovered the verbal text option on iPhones (ok fine, it was Oakie), our virtual relationship reached the next level…but it’s just not the same.
& that’s hard for me.
I’m friend-spoiled & now I’m friend-starved & a little part of my heart stamps its foot at the injustice of it all.

BUT GOD. It doesn’t matter what comes before those words, because what comes after will always change everything.

This is a consistent fear of mine: That we’ll move somewhere & somehow manage to live there for an extended period of time ALL ALONE because we can’t find any friends
& NO ONE likes us
& we cry over delicious dinners at a table set for 6 when there are only two...

As I type this, I’m smirking at how silly it sounds, but when you’ve moved 7 times in the past 3 years, rational thinking doesn’t always make it back out of the moving boxes.

Honestly, I should know better.
When we showed up in Louisiana, we jumped into a church there & walked out with FRIENDS. Like, dinner-at-their-house-every-Sunday-night friends.

When we showed up in Columbus, we already knew people (duh), but we walked out with even more FRIENDS. Like, Hitchcock-marathon-up-till-4am, share-a-backyard friends.

I prayed before I left & prayed when I got here & then prayed some more that God would send friends.
Board-game-playing, dinner-sharing, (preferably) wine-drinking friends (no offense to the non-wine drinkers, of whom my husband numbers foremost & I married him, so obviously, I love you all…).

When we showed up in Japan, we were immediately embraced by our neighbours who invited us (PERFECT STRANGERS) over to their house for Thanksgiving & have continued to show us love & kindness up to & including Lauren reaching out to make sure I was personally invited to join the women's Bible study on Camp Zama which has proved to be a huge source of encouragement to me.

I tell ya, when God wants to come through for me, He goes big.

We had begun attending a church when we first moved here & we loved spending our Sunday afternoon/evening meeting with other believers both foreign & local. But we travel a lot on the weekends to see stuff & I worried that we were damaging our chances at really getting to know people & build relationships.

In the course of 2 days, we had shared two meals with people from our church (Ramon’s family being one) & three young people we’d just met the week before: Akiko, Jesse & Donnie (if you guys are reading this, first of all, glad to see you at my blog & second of all, hey! you made the blog!)

These may all be new, fledgling friendships, but they hold the promise of hope.
New places are scary.
I’d be lying if the brave face of loving Japan withheld the truth of struggling through a huge transition, but friends? F.R.I.E.N.D.S. make this whole adventure a whole lot easier.

If you read this & thought, “Man. Friends sound super cool. I don’t have a whole lot of those & the ones I do have I never really see anymore.”
I’ve got super good news.
Stop what you’re doing & locate your phone.
If it’s in your hand, feel free to give me some feedback on how the mobile-version of this reads…
ANYWAY, once you find your phone find the contact info of someone you’re friends with or want to be friends with (c’mon, we’ve all got friend crushes. You know the ones where you’re like, “aw man, it’d be so cool to be their friend, but they’d never like meeeeee.”) & CALL THEM…OR TEXT THEM…OR SEND THEM A FACEBOOK MESSAGE.
Invite them to yo house.
And cook them some food.
And pour them some wine.
Play a game!
Have a list of 10 questions ready so you can get to know them better.
JUST DO SOMETHING TOGETHER.
If you click or connect & have fun then DO ALL OF THE THINGS OVER & OVER AGAIN.
If you don’t, chalk it up to experience & have another go with a different (potential) friend.
It’s that easy.

And if you’re reading this friendship tutorial & rolling your eyes, it’s obviously because you are already good at this & should feel very blessed & should maybe even consider inviting a loner to join your group.

We all need friends.
We all need f.r.i.e.n.d.s.

Have a friend.
Be a friend.
I give it a 10 out of 10.

P.S. As evidenced by Ross & Monica, family are friends too. So to all my family who just read this & felt slighted...you can stop that now.

8 comments:

  1. This one just made me happy. And it made me cry a little. But really now, what DOESN'T make me cry at least a little?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I understand this on such a deep level.
      #allthehappiness #ANDallthetears

      Delete
  2. Beautiful! I have found that as I get older, it's harder and harder to make actual- real life- I can sob on your couch and you won't judge- kind of friends. But I do have hope. You have inspired me to message one of those friend crushes that I feel like she will never like meeeeeee. Doing it now. Sending a message. Love ya, Caroline & Oakie!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Comments like this make my entire day.
      Sometimes we just need the proverbial bandaid to make us feel BRAVE!
      We love you too, Sally!

      Delete
  3. Sally Baker is my friend crush.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. AHHHH! Go for it!
      #gettingfriendcrushestogethersince2016

      Delete
  4. Love!

    Fun
    Real
    Insightful
    Easy
    Nice
    Do it
    Special

    ReplyDelete